“Perfectly Imperfect Recovery,” is how Margaux Laskey, the creator and solo performer of the Off Broadway hit Size Ate describes her own recovery from her battle with an eating disorder and the intended message of her show. (See the review in Playing Around).
Margaux decided to end her battle in 1999 when she found herself faced with a choice: Put a stop to her eating disorder or simply disappear. Luckily for everyone, she chose to put an end to her battle and so began lots and lots of therapy, as she puts it.
Margaux came to New York in 1997 after graduating from the University of Mississippi with a degree in theater. Two years after moving to the Big Apple, Margaux relapsed into her calorie-counting, continuous-walking ways. She enrolled in an acting class, hoping that learning the craft would help her to heal. Little did Margaux know that through the process of healing, along with her passion to perform, she would produce a successful one-woman show called Size Ate.
While in the acting class, Margaux looked over her old journal entries kept over many years, documenting her struggle with her eating disorder. She read over her feelings and thoughts, reflecting her seesawing between anorexia and binge eating. Amazed at the language and imagery that filled her writings, she made the race decision to share her entries with her acting class. Her peers urged her to publicize in some way—any way—her thoughts and entries. Before she knew it, she was being encouraged to have a one-woman show where she would share her feelings and journey through the disorder and onto her recovery.
“I was afraid that doing this would be too melodramatic,” says Margaux. Incorporating humor and comedy came easily to her, and she sprinkled in writings from her journal entries and added some new reflections. As props, Melissa adopted her “home girls,” life-size mannequins, labeled with dress sizes, 0 through 16.
Margaux unveiled her play slowly, inviting a few of her friends. No surprise: They were impressed. Word began to spread and soon her show drew a larger audience filled, not just with her friends, but also with unknown faces eager to hear her message. More claps and more laughs led Margaux to officially open up the play to the public in November 2005 in New York.
The response and turnout have produced many touching moments for Margaux as she has allowed herself to express through the play her many talents—singing, comedy and dancing. In one hour she goes from reliving the development of her eating battle at age 13 to making fun of mainstream diet fads and media images. The title—Size Ate—reflects Margaux’s longtime desire to be the perfect size 8. “Wouldn’t it be great to be a size 8,” she sings during the show.
“I have been writing play my whole life,” she says. Margaux began her life in Milan, Michigan, spelled like the glamorous Italian city but, as she points out, certainly not a replica. She moved to Louisiana at the age of eight and then moved with her family to Valdosta, Georgia, which she describes as a very southern town full of grits, sweet tea and seductive drawls. After graduating “Ole Miss” she headed north to New York where she found various jobs. She waited tables, worked at Steuben Glass, and even interned for free at a casting agency where, as she says, she learned so much it was invaluable.
Margaux keeps tucked in her mind one of the most positive feedbacks she received during the beginning of Size Ate. A 16 year old girl approached her after the show, teary eyed and hugged Margaux saying, “What you are doing is so important. Thank you.” Whenever Margaux is struggling with the logistical challenges of the show, she reminds herself of that girl and she continues to push forward.
Size Ate continues to help Margaux. When she is on stage, she feels like she is letting out her dirty little secret all over again, and being healed inn the process. Sure, she says there are bad days sometimes, just bad moments where she feels herself slipping back into old habits. Now, however, she knows how to recognize these urges, deal with them, and move forward.
Pausing when talking about the show, Margaux says, “Something about the process is so incredibly healing, empowering and enlightening.”
Size Ate continues to travel to universities and colleges and Margaux hopes to have the show back in New York and expand the number of performances and venues where she performs. She currently works for a media company during the day but knows her “body” is not meant to sit behind a desk, clearly evident through her humorous, creative and exhilarating creation, Size Ate. Now ain’t that great!
Woman Around Town’s Six Questions
Favorite Place to Shop: For food, International Grocery on Ninth Avenue between 40th and 41st Streets. The smell of that place alone is worth a visit. It’s not fancy and the employees aren’t interested in polite chatter, but it’s a delicious feast for the senses: big barrels of spices, olives and nuts, giant blocks of baking chocolate, all sorts of Greek specialties including an amazing fava bean salad, spinach pie and tzaziki. Bonus: There’s a big, fat, completely disinterested cat lurking around that adds to the ambiance.
For window shopping for clothes and jewelry, Bergdorf Goodman and Barney’s. A girl can dream. I used to buy eye makeup remover at Bergdorfs just for the shopping bag.
For real” shopping for clothes: Anthropologie and consignment shops. I love vintage clothing.
Favorite Place to Eat: Ha! Like I could narrow that down! Let’s see…
Favorite bagels: Brooklyn Bagel on Steinway Street in Astoria, Queens
Favorite diner: Westway Diner on Eighth Avenue and 43rd Street
Favorite place for a kinda fancy weeknight dinner: The Eatery on Eighth Avenue and 54th Street
Best burger: Corner Bistro
Best cheesecake: Oreo cheesecake at The Coach House Diner in Jersey City, New Jersey
Best splurge: The Old Homestead steakhouse
The list could go on…
But really, my absolute favorite place to eat is at home on the couch with my fiancé, Scott. We love to cook, and we love to eat. I make a mean beef and pork chili with raisins, slivered almonds and green olives, seasoned with cinnamon, cumin, chili powder, allspice and cloves. Serve it with some black beans and jasmine rice. Who needs Balthazar?
Favorite New York Sight: the James A Farley Post Office on Eighth Avenue and 30th Street. It’s so majestic and old-school and substantial—so unlike any of the new buildings in the city. I feel like I’m stepping into a black and white movie whenever I go there. I love the Herodotus quote across the top of the building: “Neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night stay these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.” So romantic. Makes me want to write love letters.
Favorite New York Moment: Moving here in 1997 after graduating from the University of Mississippi. I landed in Newark late at night, and I remember riding the airport shuttle into the city. As the skyline came into view, I remember being really scared, but I also remember thinking to myself, “I’m home.” That was also the first night I hailed a cab.
What You Love About New York: You can find whatever you want pretty much whenever you want it.
What You Hate About New York: The pace and the volume. Some days, I wish I could turn it all down a few thousand notches. And I miss wraparound porches.
