By Charlene Giannetti

Roseann Quinn was a schoolteacher whose grisly murder in 1973 inspired Judith Rossner’s book and later the film, Looking for Mr. Goodbar, starring Diane Keaton and Richard Gere, pictured above in a scene from the movie. Quinn led a double life, respected educator during the day, risk-seeking sex addict by night. She frequented bars to meet men, the more rough and unattractive the better. Her quest for “Mr. Goodbar” led to her death when she brought home John Wayne Wilson and he stabbed her eighteen times.

These days, Quinn would have placed an ad in the “Casual Encounters” section of Craigslist to meet her sexual partners. And she might have met the same fate, also the one suffered by New Yorker Julissa Brisman, who was found shot to death in Boston.

Our mothers used to warn us about picking up men in bars. And after Keaton’s character was murdered on screen, those warnings were repeated with great emotion. They worried about us and, truth be told, we worried about ourselves and about our friends. (Now, of course, we worry about our daughters). Yet there is something different about meeting someone face-to-face in a public place, seeing how he acts with those around him. “There’s an alarm system in your biology,” one of my friends said. “You can sense when something’s off. You don’t have that warning online.”

Quinn didn’t pick up on those signals or she chose to ignore her instincts. What about Brisman? Up until she met Philip Markoff, her suspected killer, all of her encounters with him had been through the Internet. She had placed an ad on Craigslist offering her services as a masseuse and apparently, after a series of e-mails, they arranged to meet at the Marriott Copley Place in Boston. Was she looking for a sexual encounter? No one, at this point, knows, although there was a massage table set up in her hotel room. Two other women who had also advertised their services on Craigslist—one a prostitute from Las Vegas—were also allegedly attacked by Markoff in the same hotel. Suffolk County, Massachusetts, District Attorney Daniel Conley has urged other women who were assaulted after advertising their services on Craigslist to come forward.

Craigslist has rapidly become the classified ad section of choice nationwide. Its success is the reason newspapers are suffering financially. Placing an ad on Craigslist is fast, immediate, and has farther reach than local newspapers. Millions of people now depend on Craigslist to find jobs, employees, houses, cars, and babysitters. Online ads, on Craigslist and elsewhere, are also becoming an effective way to “hook up,” for a one-time thrill or a more lasting relationship. Is it any more dangerous to meet someone online than it is in a bar or through a magazine ad?

Communicating online oftentimes produces a false sense of security. It’s easy to feel you really know someone after exchanging a series of e-mails, especially if those missives tap into a person’s vulnerabilities. Pedophiles have been known to lurk in chat rooms, learn all they can about a young person, and then suddenly “pop up” as a soul mate. “You’re from Wisconsin? So am I! You love hiking in the snow? So do I! You would rather be relaxing in front of a roaring fire instead of partying? Me, too!” Almost too good to be true, right? Oftentimes, it is.

Adults can reach the same level of intimacy in their e-mail exchanges. Now with Facebook and Twitter, people can really get up close and personal. We can follow each other online, learning a person’s every move.

Of course, many women are not looking for love online. They are looking for work. If they free lance, they may depend upon the classifieds for a constant stream of clients. If a client requests a meeting in his apartment or a hotel room, should the cautious person pass on the job? In this economic climate, the impetus may be to throw caution to the wind and just go. Was that the choice facing Brisman? Was she looking for business or risky business? We may never know.

There is a cautionary tale for others. Checking after clicking is a wise move. Craiglist itself posts safety precautions on its website, telling a user when meeting someone for the first time to remember to:

* Insist on a public meeting place like a cafe
* Tell a friend or family member where you’re going
* Take your cell phone along if you have one
* Consider having a friend accompany you
* Trust your instincts

Nothing can save a woman courting danger because she wants to experience a rush. For the rest of us, however, the wise strategy is to be cautious. Very cautious.