There’s a smattering of applause. Is that Kiefer Sutherland wearing glasses and a hat that obscures his face? Not sure. But wait, that’s definitely Chris Noth (I didn’t realize he was that tall; did you?). Big applause. Because hey, that’s what we’ve been waiting for. It’s a clear night, and we want to see some stars.

So, OK, in addition to the star of Fox’s 24, and Mr. Big, there’s that old timer—Brian Cox—we’ve seen him in a million movies; he always plays the bad guy, right? The good looking actor playing the drunk is Jason Patric; not only did his dad (Jason Miller) write this play, he’s actually Jackie Gleason’s grandson. How cool is that?

That Championship Season won the Tony and the Pulitzer. It’s gotta be great… It’ll probably pick up any minute… You know, it’s actually kinda boring.

And therein lays the problem. Even with high wattage actors, the show is old hat. When it was first produced in 1972, the world was a different place. Now, we’ve seen it all, heard it all, and ho-hum, the Glory Days men we know in real life are meaner, dirtier, and more pathetic.

Two guys reminisce about the epileptic girl they both “banged” in high school, or maybe she was “ just retarded.” OK, got it. Insensitive jerks. We hear every racial and religious slur, and no surprise, Coach (Cox) proclaims his love for Joe McCarthy, and laments his passing. Got it. We can chuckle over the ignorance of these small town hicks; we’re so clearly superior.

The only one on stage who’s even vaguely sympathetic is Tom, the sarcastic drunk played by Patric. He’s ready to tell it like it is, but not till he’s had another pop of booze.

Sutherland, as Tom’s brother James, has the more challenging role. He is by turns ingratiating, angry, and pathetic. He hits every note and lets us see the desperation beneath the calm façade.

Noth brings life to the stage as Phil, the financially successful strip miner. He plays to the hilt the bear hugging, crotch grabbing aging playboy. His wealth and Italian heritage make him the object of both envy and scorn. His sexual escapades are a source of admiration, until it’s revealed that he’s stepped out of bounds with the wife of one of his ex-teammates.

It seems inevitable from the get-go that with the combination of alcohol, old resentments, and group delusion, this 20th year reunion of the winners of “The 1952 High School Basketball State Championship” is doomed. It’s just a question of how soon the truth will be revealed, who will get hurt the most, and why isn’t their star player ever present for these events?

And why, oh why, do these lower middle class Pennsylvanians speak with quasi-New England accents? Cox is obviously channeling Teddy Roosevelt who was, of course, from New York. He looks and dresses just like him; he has a picture of the 26th President above his mantelpiece, right near the photo of JFK; and he heaps praise on TR because “he took Panama from the Spics.”

I get that it’s a lot harder to model yourself after Pennsylvania’s own James Buchanan, but still, the Rough Rider worship reaches overkill. Only the fact that Cox is such a fine actor saves Coach from being a total buffoon.

The set of Coach’s living room is picture perfect. The wooden bannister, stained glass windows, and shabby furniture all add to the musty Victorian atmosphere. This is a man who’s obviously stuck in the past. There’s no faulting the costuming, either. Those loose, ugly gray and brown suits are exactly right for the era.

While Coach calls the group of men “boys,” and warns them against dissension, the old friends toss around a basketball, to show they’ve still got it as a team.

The fine team of actors on stage holds this show together, but they can’t overcome the fact that in the present day arena of theater, “That Championship Season” just doesn’t quite make the shot.

That Championship Season
Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre
242 West 45th Street
Limited run through May 29, 2011

Michall Jeffers is an accomplished Cultural Journalist. She writes extensively, both in print and online. Her eponymous cable TV show is syndicated throughout the tri-state area, and features celebrity interviews, reviews, and commentary. She is a voting member of Drama Desk, Outer Critics Circle, American Theatre Critics Association, International Association of Theatre Critics. www.michalljeffers.com